מכל מלמדײ השכלתי (duchifat) wrote,
מכל מלמדײ השכלתי
duchifat

насколько забиты американские мужчины

Видимо, я ткнул в Фейсбуке на какой-то линк по психологии семейных отношений (хотя я не помню такого) и мне стала приходить реклама групп для мужчин как избежать развода (Может фейсбук знает про меня что-то, чего я сам еще не знаю?):

Let’s Get Your Wife Back to the Table, the Marriage, and the Bedroom Fast! In this Masterclass, You’ll Discover… How to get your wife to come back into the conversation about healing your marriage, even if she has completely shut down. How to get her to come back into the marriage, admit & work on her own failures in the marriage, even if right now she insists that you’re 100% to blame.

Мужик, который ведет группу, пишет:


"Hello men! I wanted to introduce myself.

My name is Mike Frazier. I've been married almost 15 years to the wonderful woman in the picture and we have five children.

Our marriage was very difficult for a very long time.

I often felt like whatever I did, it wasn't enough for her.

I worked hard to go through medical school, residency and private practice to provide for my family.

I did my best to be a good father for my children.

I tried to understand her, to serve her, to help her, to be there for her.

But, I never really felt appreciated for what I did.

I felt shut out. Like she didn't really care.

I would want to share things with her, and would try sometimes, but I didn't get far. I didn't feel like she was listening.

I felt like I was being used as a meal ticket and sometimes a babysitter and a servant around the house. That I was only good for that to her.

Our sex life was awful. She would never initiate, and would usually shut me down if I initiated.

When we did have sex, it wasn't all that great because I felt like I was taking something from her. Like I had finally worn her down enough to give in.

I felt like I got a lot more attention from my fellow female students, residents, doctors and nurses.

I would sometimes wonder if I would be better off with one of them. I would imagine how different life would be if I could be with one of them, or some girl from my past.

Of course, I felt guilty about this. I knew that wasn't right.

But I didn't know what else to do.

Sometimes I would go to my car at night and just scream because I felt like I couldn't take it anymore.

I didn't feel like I could really talk to anyone about all this.

I had to act like things were fine at work, at church, and with my family.

I distanced myself from friends and family because I didn't want anyone to know what was going on.

It was a very lonely, stressful, sad and anxious time.

I thought about divorce plenty of times. It seemed like such an easy way out.

I got some sense talked into my by a church leader. He helped me understand that even if I got divorced, I would still have contact with her, would pay 30-40% of my income in child support, pay her alimony, lose half of my other assets, and would lose time with my children.

Also, those payments to alimony and child support would probably have gone towards her dating some other guy, and someone taking my place as "father figure" to my children while they were with her!

I went back and forth, but decided to do my best to make it work."


Меня это шокировало: неужели американские мужчины настолько забитые и всего боятся, что хотят во чтобы то ни стало вернуть расположение женщин, которые их не любят и не уважают, a хотят только использовать? B результате чего они плачут втихаря, имея высокооплачиваемую работу, денежную профессию и образование. Не пора ли из Америки в Израиль увозить детей, если тут такие условия для семейной жизни?

Или, может быть, разговоры про то, что он научит как сделать жен довольными - это политкорректный эвфемизм, а на самом деле он собрался учить как манипулировать женщинами? Просто не может говорит прямо, засудят? Как дискриминацию белых мужчин старше 40 называют age discrimination, поскольку не могут прямо назвать "дискриминацией мужчин".

Короче, оказалось - ни то и ни другое. Мормон и просто использует крючок для религиозной пропаганды.
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